that little fly.. little bastard fly! grrr at you fly.
so, the scenario is, as like a lot of the time.. i'm sitting in bed, no lights, just the computer screen on.. clicking and clicking at the inbox button for my email account, waiting or hoping or wishing or all of the above, simultaneously (that's right.. men CAN multi-task.. just when the 3 things are exactly the same and just have slightly different words to describe them) for an email to appear from a certain incredible girl.. the same one that has my heart.. yeah, that's the one. the amazing one.. anyways. so there i was.. 'click, nothing yet. click, nothing yet.' when this pesky tiny little fly thing rolls up onto the screen.. giving it the big dog in town. by the way.. i have no idea if it was a fly or a bug or an insect. aren't all flying things flys? apart from birds, obvioulsy. and dinosaurs, but they probably wouldn't land on my computer screen. and fish.. and butterflies. ok.. so not all flying things are flies. fly's? who knows. but yeah, flying things that are smaller than your average fly.. they can be described as flies.. to all of us without a doctorate in 'flying things smaller than an M&M'. now, that is what you call a tangent. anyways. this hot shot little fly thing rolls onto my screen.. thinking he's 'all that and a satsuma' trying to distract me from my clicking.. and starts strutting his way across the screen. being the caring and humane individual that i can be.. i gave him the complete opportunity to walk away.. to access the situation and realise for himself that it would end in tears, and more than likely not mine.. unless the fly knows that kung fu stuff they have on jet li films where he can use someone's energy against them. that would have been bad.. 'what the hell happened to you?!' says my mum finding me bloody and beaten with my head smashed through a computer screen.. 'damn fly knew kung fu.. wasn't expecting that!' ANYWAY!! so he was testing his luck.. and subconsciously assuming he wasn't the jet li of the flying insect world, i went to flick him. my patience had worn thin. and the little bugger evaded me! and whats worse than evading my almighty death flick, he sought refuge in the safety of the underside of my screen! little git. i bet he was laughing.. and i couldn't let him have the last laugh.. so i ever so gently squashed the screen in to get the little bugger.
i will now admit that, with a dead fly permanently squished under my screen, and a trickle of what can only be described as 'bug juice' running underneath it, i am not the sharpest tool in the box. i am, in fact, an idiot.
what's worse is that the little bastard had the last laugh.. and will always be there as a reminder of how he defeated me.
maybe he was jet li... don't those marshall arts people in films always sacrifice themselves for the greater good? taught me a lesson to be fair...
LEARN TO FLICK BETTER!
