"If there's one thing i find ruins my evening, it's having my arse electricuted"
"Also.. yis"
"sodomy is a sticky subject.. your gunna need to be a little bit more specific"
"I hate you so much it gives me energy! I have to wake up early just to hate you, as there isn't enough time in the day"
"probably not but definitely is!"
"My music tastes are deep........I own 4 Craig David albums!"
"She's fuckin' good at sex........mind you if I cooked a roast dinner every day of the year I'd probably be pretty good at that!"
"Why is it a pair of jeans? Its not a pair of jumpers is it? "I've jot a new pair of jeans".......no you havn't mate you've only got one!"
"Real skateboarding is rubbish........I could murder all those boys on Tony Hawk's!"
"I'd rather smell an arse than be cold!"
"I've had a shocker........I've just bought some salami sandwiches and some bits of salami.......and I don't like salami!"
"I don't like chamonix. Never been there..... just don't like it!"
"The rebels were like the Taliban......just look at Luke Skywalker- he lived in the middle of the desert in a cave. You dont get more Osama Bin Laden than that!"
(Ceila finnishing with Dunc and going out with Chris) "Thats like loosing 50 quid and finding a Fiver!"
"I don't believe in father christmas. Even when I was 4 I questioned the logistics. There's no way he could make it round that many houses in that amount of time. My paper round used to take me 3 hours and that was just Creaton"
NPH - "There is one thing I don't like eating- I'll give you a clue-It's black"
Dunc - "Is it a black man's cock?"
NPH "No..... I'd eat one of them!"
